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Welcome to Fixfear.us – This website is dedicated to helping you achieve maximum self-confidence & self-esteem through curing your anxiety and fears. Feel free to browse the articles and short stories to the right side of the page or purchase the full book “FIX FEAR” (100% money back guarantee) – “Sic ill” D. Jackson (Author of Fix Fear)

Don’t fall for pessimistic people’s opinions, negative news media and the 2012 hype. It’s your life and you will live it the way you want to with full confidence, self esteem, no fear and with a positive outlook on life! Information provided does not substitute for professional help, but will assist changing you from the inside out. This book is a great self-help adventure for anyone doing any activity.

 

BLAME

SHORT STORY

Bad Driver (Emotions: Blame/Impatience)

Corbin is on his way to work. He has two ways in which he travels. The short way and the long way. The long way consists of back-roads, stop signs and stop lights. The short way is the
freeway, but it is known to get clogged during his commute. Corbin wakes late, his long trip will make him arrive just in time, his short trip, ten minutes early. He decides to take the freeway. He is driving peaceably on the road when an incompetent driver tailgates an unfortunate car. In rage, Corbin yells out the window at the driver, but his efforts are futile as this event starts a traffic jam.

Corbin arrives ten minutes late to work, his whole ride is filled with curses and complaints about the bad driver. He tells his boss about the incident. His boss does not budge and
explains that Ralph (his neighbor) took the back-roads today and arrived on time. His boss lets him off with a warning. Corbin realizes he blames his problem on the bad driver instead of taking responsibility of his mistake. Suddenly his anger and frustrations fade away.

BLAME
Criticizing a person is blame whereas saying good things about someone is praise. In blame, judgement is used on the basis of morals and that they have been violated. The blamer will
negatively judge in the mindset it makes the seem superior. “Self-Blame” results from taking responsibility for the feelings and actions of someone else and taking on victim symptoms such as helplessness, passiveness, feeling guilty, shame, remorse. Negative thoughts caused by the anxiety of this
self-victimization will ultimately grow into depression, sadness,
pessimistic attitude.

CURE: Blaming takes away value, so give value by using the appropriate praise. Enjoy and embrace someones flaws instead of calling attention to them and be praiseworthy. Tell them about what they are doing morally right is the highest form of praise,
superficial forms of praise are secondary, complimenting hair,
clothes, car, house. Do not blame yourself for other peoples actions or let someone else mistake ruin your day, their error could have happened to anyone else so why drag yourself down.

BLAME (Quotes)
“A man can fail many times, but he isn’t a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.” – John Burroughs

“Blame is just a lazy person’s way of making sense of chaos.” – Doug Coupland

“Don’t blame the messenger because the message is unpleasant.” – Kenneth Starr

“Ego is a social fiction for which one person at a time gets all the blame.” – Robert Anton Wilson

“I envy people who drink – atleast they know what to blame everything on.” – Oscar Levant

“I pay no attention whatever to anybodys praise or blame. I simply follow my own feelings.” – Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

“I think it’s very important that you make own decision about what you are. Therefore you’re responsible for your actions so you don’t blame other people.” – Prince William

“I think people nowadays do tend to blame their parents for everything.” – Peter Shaffer

“When we blame, we give away our power.” – Greg Anderson

“No one is a failure until they blame somebody else.” – Charles Jones

ENVY

SHORT STORY

Cub’s fan (Emotions: Envy/Rage)

A modest family of three. Julian, his older brother Jacob and mother June live together in a small block cabin. June tries her best as a waiter, but her meager earnings are so that she can hardly afford anything except that is necessary to survive.
One day quite near his birthday, June asks Julian to get Jacob breakfast. Lately, Jacob has been leaving the house early on the weekends to play soccer with his friends – his mother
must have forgot. He stomps his feet. He knows with Julian gone he will have to do all of todays chore work solely for the second day. Just as he starts to turn back, a gust of wind swings the door open. On the immediate shelf is a Chicago Cubs cap. Julian is the biggest cubs fan. A look of sorrow falls on his face. It is so
close to his birthday and Jacob seems to be getting a gift of praise – and at present, doesn’t seem fair.

Julian really really wants this hat. He cannot control himself. He snatches the cap and quickly runs through the yard. He walks to a fresh puddle of water. With a swift pitch it transforms to filth. Later this evening Jacob arrives home with a soaking wet cap in his hands. His eyes are somewhat stretched. He apologizes for his absence and hands his mother the cap. Julian, satisfied, grins away and awaits punishment. June walks to Julian and gently strokes his head.

“You just threw away your birthday gift.”

ENVY
Having emotions that you lack a certain quality that another individual has is called envy. The more similar a person is with the relished trait or quality, the more envious. Envy can be seen as good if seen by the perspective it motivates an individual to do better. While envy’s cousin jealousy is targeted at a person, envious people target a possession. Envious people take delight at others misfortune, trying to outperform or size-down one another. Frequent causes of envy are a perceived lack of materials and perceived lack of status.

CURE: A person who is envious is confused on what it is to be happy. The individual must realize it is not through material or physical outside things that will create happiness. Uplift yourself about being grateful about the things you do own in the present, making the best use of it.

ENVY (Quotes)
“Envy, like the worm, never runs but to the fairest fruit; like a cunning bloodhound, it singles out the fattest deer in the flock.” – Francis Beamont

“The wicked envy and hate; it is their way of admiring.” – Victor Hugo

“Envy is the art of wanting the other fellow’s blessings instead of your own.” – Harold Coffin

“Hatred is active, and envy passive dislike; these is but one step from envy to hate.” – Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

“Never trust anyone who wants what you’ve got. Friend or no, envy is an overwhelming emotion.” – Eubie Blake

“Never underestimate the power of jealousy and the power of envy to destroy. Never underestimate that.” – Oliver Stone

FEAR

FEAR

Fear is the pessimistic emotions felt when in danger. Fear can change a persons behavior patterns by making them escape or avoid future situations that are uncontrollable. Fear can be experienced externally from sources outside the body (ex.
heights, clowns) or internally (ex. self-doubt, inferiority) Fear is
not known at birth, fear is learned through lessons in our early youth. It is a natural selection trait stemming from the human mind adapting to be ready for a situation. Over preparation and unhealthy attention to the negative outcome of a situation will then result in fear, decreasing the personal freedom in your
lifestyle.

Common types of fear: fear of flying, fear of public speaking, fear of intimacy, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of being alone.

CURE: We do not fear the things we DO know. Fear is a combination of many negative emotions and must be faught off in numerous ways – found throughout this book. Having an
optimistic mindstate no matter what future circumstances hold must be learned and applied to unteach fear. This can be through trial and experimentation, becoming knowledgable, acceptance of something/someone, thinking about the good things about something rather that bad ones and challenging these negative affirmations with positive ones. (ex. I’m scared of clowns/I love clowns – I know I love clowns – Clowns love me everywhere I go)

FEAR (Quotes)
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” – Mark Twain

“Do not fear mistakes. You will know failure. Continue to reach out.” – Benjamin Franklin

“Do the thing we fear, and death of fear is certain.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

“In order to succeed your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.” – Bill Cosby

“Advance and never halt, for advancing is perfection. Advance
and do not fear the thorns in the path, for they draw only corrupt blood.” – Khalil Gibran

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

“I believe that every single event in life happens in a opportunity to choose love over fear.” – Oprah Winfrey

“The components of anxiety, stress, fear and anger do not exist independently of you in the world. They simply do not exist in the
physical world, even though we talk about them as if they do.” – Wayne Dyer

“What we seek we shall find; what we flee from flees from us.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

HELPLESSNESS

SHORT STORY

Wizard Dinner (Emotions:Jealousy/Helplessness)

Deep in Camelot lives a wizard and witch couple. Morlo and Marla. The couple are a happily married pair of 116 years with no intention of parting. There is one problem. At the time of dinner Morlo the wizard disappears. He has been for the last 26 years. One day after a good nights rest, Marla wakes earlier than Morlo
in bed. She switches Morlos wand with a tall thick piece of licorice. When the time for supper arrives, Morlo walks away to do his usual disappearing act but is stunned when his wand doesn’t work. Marla meets him and telles him she replaced his
wand with licorice because he vanished when she cooked dinner.
Morlo explains that he always leaves because she always only cooks gourmet rats and he is tired of the sme food every night. So he goes to the Manor House down the street to eat beef, bacon and lamb the excellent chef cooks. Upset, Marla puts her wand in the air and yells a terrible spell. She tells Morlo that the
chef and the entire household are now cows, pigs and sheep.

HELPLESSNESS
“Learned helplessness” is where someone has learned to act helpless even with offered help if the person feels he connot take the outcome. It may be derived from having a feeling of worthlessness. Misunderstanding situations and passive aggressiveness may accompany a person of helplessness as their misguided beliefs say to them that there is nothing of their doing that can change a situation. Helplessness leads to hopelessness and may also effect their health, diet and mutual stability.

CURE: A person in helplessness will have a negative outlook on life and this must be turned into a positive “healthy” outlook on life. They must learn that they alone control their own outcome and existence. They must learn to see the positive in other people and in themselves. They must learn to stop making excuses and
find solutions to the problem. They must think more about past positive experiences than the negative one. Ask yourself if you’re making the reasons and then becoming helpless. Stop running from pain to get pleasure and work on ways to avoid pain.

HELPLESSNESS (Quotes)
“Helplessness induces hopelessness and history attests that loss of hope and not loss of lives is what decides the issue of war.” – B.H. Liddell Hart

“It is hardly possible to build anything if fustration, bitterness and a mood of helplessness prevail.” – Lech Walesa

“Learned helplessness is the giving up reaction, the quitting response that follows from the belief that whatever you do doesn’t matter.” – Arnold Schwarzenegger

“It is the highest creatures who take the longest to mature, and are the most helpless during their immaturity.” – George Bernard
Shaw

“Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.” – John Maxwell

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it and this you have the power to remake at any moment.” – Marcus Aurelius

“If I look at the mass I will never act.” – Mother Teresa

IMPATIENCE/BOREDOM

IMPATIENCE/BOREDOM “impetousness”

Not being able to stand or bear something and acting out in a negative way is called impatience. Meanwhile, patience is measured by how long it takes until the actions of impatience take place. It is natural to favor a short term reward over a long term reward. Not having the strength to hold out for the long term is the enemy here. Being too quick to actions before proper analysis leads to much uncertainty. Be smart, plan ahead. Not everything will be overly easy or instantaneous.

CURE: Patience and toleration is the cure for impatience. This includes being in control of ones emotions, not returning insults and harm it enduring a bad situation. Patience is acting out intentions in an organized mind state. Be intelligent and use your brain instead of acting on emotions. Constant desiring of what
you do not have will spoil the things you do possess. Not every gift comes with a red ribbon in a shiny package.

IMPATIENT CHECKLIST:

• Stop rushing your speech
• Stop trying to achieve extremely quick
• Stop worrying about the time you’re wasting
• Stop being overly competitive
• Stop interrupting others when they talk
• Stop being mean to people who move/act/talk slower than you

*By moving and acting more slower and relaxed you will actually start to feel more relaxed

IMPATIENCE (Quotes)
“In all evils which admit a remedy, impatience should be avoided because it wastes that time and attention in complaints which if properly applied might remove the cause.” – Samuel Johnson

“All human errors are impatience, a premature breaking off of methodical procedure, an apparent fencing-in of what is apparently at issue.” – Franz Kafka

“Patience is the art of concealing your impatience.” – Guy Kawasaki

“Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience
creates confidence, decisiveness and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.” – Brian Adams

“You get impatience. Then you start showing what you’re going to do early because you get more aggressive.” – Kevin Bentley

“There art two cardinal sins from which all others spring; impatience and laziness.” – Franz Kafka

“The trademark of our program is finding the open guy, and we didn’t do that today. I don’t think we executed. Our patience wasn’t there. I didn’t recognize our team (Because of) how we played early. The impatience and forcing things just put us in a
hole.” – Jamie Dixon

JEALOUSY

JEALOUSY

Fear, anticipated loss, insecurity and anxiety are just some of the feelings that signal the emotion of jealousy. Jealousy combines emotional states such as anger, sadness, resentment
and other low level states to form this behavior and though process.

Signs of jealousy include fear of loss, distrust, sadness, suspicion of betrayal, uncertainty. In relationships it can manifest when one partner suspects the other of having feelings or relations with a rival, threatening the current partnership. The
jealous person will show forms of behavior to self regulate the relationship. Men are more affected by the sexual infidelity of a
cheating spouse. Females are more affected by the emotional infidelity (feeling of abandonment) and thoughts of being replaced.

CURE: Realize that you do not “own” anyone except yourself and that other people are free of choice in their thoughts to like and want whatever they want. True love is letting someone else be themselves. True jealousy is not letting someone be themselves.

Jealousy (Quotes)
“A competent and self confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.” – Robert A. Heinlein

“Jealousy is that pain which a man feels from the apprehension that he is not equally beloved by the person whom he entirely loves.” – Joseph Addison

“Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.” – Fulton J. Sheen

“To cure jealousy is to see it for what it is, a dissatisfaction with self.” – Joan Didion

“There is never jealousy where there is not strong regard.” – Washington Irving

“It is not love that is blind, but jealousy.” – Lawrence Durrell

“Jealousy is the injured lover’s hell.” – John Milton

“In jealousy there is more self-love than love.” – Francois Duc de la Rochefoucauld

“Jealousy is the great exaggerator.” – Johann Christoph Friedrich von Schiller

“Don’t waste time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind.” – Mary Schmich

PAIN

SHORT STORY

The Mad Racer (Emotions: Vengeance/Pain)

Neil is a retired amateur race car driver. He spends most his time pondering how his life could have been had it not been for a fatal accident caused by his arch rival, Antonio. On that day he experienced the beginning of a lifetime with severe back pain. Retired and angry, Neil vowed vengeance for Antonio. As a youth he learned that by stuffing a potato in the exhaust pipe he could
cause a car to stop running, but only for a few minutes until the exhaust pressure releases. He is only recently retired and still has clearance to the race track. He uses this to arrive earlier than the drivers.

Antonio is no where in sight. He takes the potato from his pocket, shoves it snugly into the pipe, and exits the building. Later this day his phone rings. As Neil is finishing up his evening with dinner his phone rings abruptly. He answers and to his
shock, it is his former boss. He says he is calling to tell Neil that Antonio died in a car pile-up in the first lap of a race after his car suddenly died. Neil is devastated, he never knew his act of revenge would be so drastic. He now lives retired and even more
depressed. He never thought his best friend would retaliate by dying.

PAIN
Pain is an unpleasant sensation either physically or emotionally. It is a signal to the mind or body to protect and heal the self. Under the influence of pain, optimal functioning of the
human body is compromised. Things which cause insensitivity to pain are happiness, love, war, severe injury and outside encouragement. Short lasting pain is called acute (less than a month) long lasting pain is called chronic (1/2 year or more) It is
very important that you feel and recognize pain as your body is
telling you it is injured physically or emotionally. Insensitivity to pain causes a person to be in critical risk of unfelt damage and further damage by not correcting the injury.

Phantom pain is feeling pain in an area of the body that doesn’t exist. Amputees frequently experience this type of pain, and it’s source is neuropathic (damage or disease in the nervous system) Psychogenic pain is when someone is hurting mentally/
emotionally. There is often no source for psychogenic pain and therapists are more qualified than medical doctors in this case.

Psychogenic pain’s source can be found by admitting the objective truth of a situation and taking responsibility to improve it or else deal with anxiety, depression, neuroticism.

CURE: There are serious situations where the treatment of pain should be carried out by a licensed physician. These are tips for self treatment, they include the following: Knowing the exact time of the pain, knowing how severe/strong it is. Then cure yourself or get help from a friend, family member, loved one or
other type of social support.

PAIN (Quotes)
“The aim of the wise is not to secure pleasure, but to avoid pain.” – Aristotle

“Fear is pain arising from the anticipation of evil.” – Aristotle

“Find a place inside where there’s joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.” – Joseph Campbell

“It is easier to find men who will volunteer to die than to find those who are willing to endure pain with patience.” – Julius Caesar

“Nature shows that with the growth of intelligence comes increased capacity for pain, and it is only with the highest degree off intelligence that suffering reaches its supreme point.” – Arthur
Schopenhauer

“The two enemies of human happiness are pain and boredom.” – Arthur Schopenhauer

“We cannot be more sensitive to pleasure without being more sensitive to pain.” – Alan Watts

“I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense once the hate is gone they will be forced to deal with the pain.” – James A. Baldwin

“For these cultures, getting rid of the pain without addressing the deeper cause would be like shutting off a fire alarm while the fire’s still going.” – David Foster Wallace

PARANOIA

PARANOIA

Mistakenly perceiving a threat is against oneself to the point of irrationality is paranoia.

CURE: Realizing there is no threat. The threat is not as bad as you make it seem. See what obstacle is in your way objectively through the eyes of your peers, do what you can then stop fixating on the problem.

PARANOIA (Quotes)
“Sometimes paranoia is just having all the facts.” – William S. Burroughs

“This is a do-it-yourself test for l paranoia.: you know you’ve got it when you can’t think anything that’s your fault.” – Robert M. Hutchins

“Paranoia is the delusion that your enemies are organized.” – Arthur D. Hlavaty

“Confusion is an often too subtle sign of paranoia.” – Anne Austin

“Frankly, when you prey upon the fears, the paranoia of citizens, it is akin to looting in a different sort of way.” – Sonny Perdue

“I know a secret, and secrets breed paranoia.” – Simon Holt

“Paranoia is transmissible from mind to mind, but it does not go by route of reason. It can therefore change its rationalization while remaining essentially the same.” – William Nicholls

“I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.” – J.D. Salinger

“I envy paranoids; they actually feel people are paying attention to them.” – Susan Sontag

RAGE\ANGER

RAGE/ANGER

Anger is self preservation either physical, emotional, spiritual by being physically or verbally abusive. It can be argued that anger in it’s purest essence is actually a positive emotion and can be used positively. Rage is different from anger. Whereas you can focus aggression to or be angry at someone – in a state of rage there may be many emotions at once, making concentration impossible. A toddler pouting out his lip, stomping
his feet is anger (focused on parent) A crying newborn baby is rage (unfocused)
——————————————————————-
*Aggressive Anger – Building, threatening people, shouting, playing on peoples weaknesses, being pushy

CURE: Realize you have weaknesses yourself, you could be receiving the same treatment from another.
——————————————————————-
*Blame – Coming to swift conclusions, blame other people for your own internal actions.

CURE: Take responsibility for your actions. Think long and clear
until coming to a conclusion.
——————————————————————-
*Grandiosity – Showing off, mistrust, not listening, poor sport

CURE: Developing empathy, live modestly, know not everyone is against you, listen.
——————————————————————-
*Hurtfulness – Physical violence, having no respect for other peoples feelings, blaming

CURE: Understand other peoples emotions, take responsibility
————————————————–
*Ineffectualness
Clumbsy, unreliable, setting yourself and others for failure, underachiever, sexual impotent.

CURE: Plan things out, get beforehand knowledge
—————————————-
*Obsessive Behavior: Anything done in over-abundance. Making sure things are perfect.

CURE: Get messy, let things build more before fixing them.
——————————————
*Passive Anger – “Dispassion”
Being inactive to a situation, letting others do the dirty work. Fake smiles, non-caring look. Can lead to too much time on digital cell phones, computers, video games, venting emotionally about problems that they don’t intend to fix.

CURE: Get out more, experience nature, lakes, beaches, stay away from digital technology, volunteer, think about solving problems rather than venting.
———————————–
*Revenge – Non-forgiving. Recalling negative past situations.

CURE: Think of the positives of the past and forget and forgive old negative states
——————————-
*Selfishness – Ignore other peoples needs, worrying excessively about yourself

CURE: Help others when in need of your specialized assistance, see a whole situation objectively
———————————
*Sneaky
Silent treatment, avoiding eye contact, gossip, stealing, putting people down.

CURE: Tell the truth about intentions. Be honest, removing yourself from negative conversations.
——————————————
*Threats – Frightening people, pointing fingers, door slamming, showing your concealed weapon.

CURE: Become confident in yourself and do not let your insecurities make you act inappropriately.

RAGE (Quotes)
“Boredom is rage spread thin.” – Paul Tillich

“If I look at my old lyrics, they seem to be full of rage, but empty. There was an emptiness in my life.” – Billie Joe Armstrong

“My father was predisposed to drunken rages. I would hide under
the bed. My sister and I were talking just the other day about the terror a drunken man in a rage can create in a child.” – Antonio Villaraigosa

“People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.” – Will Rogers

“Whoever has provoked men to rage against him has always gained a party in his favor too.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

“Oppose not rage while rage is in its force, but give way a while and let it waste.” – William Shakespeare

“Men in rage strike those that wish them best.” – William Shakespeare